You’re Going to Die!
Jan 3rd, 2007 at 1:13 pm by Chris
Pat Robertson has been talking to God again and, as with all apocalyptic proclamations made by the hate filled and the insane, it’s newsworthy:
VIRGINIA BEACH, Virginia (AP) — Evangelical broadcaster Pat Robertson said Tuesday that God has told him that a terrorist attack on the United States would cause a “mass killing” late in 2007.
“I’m not necessarily saying it’s going to be nuclear,” he said during his news-and-talk television show “The 700 Club” on the Christian Broadcasting Network.
“The Lord didn’t say nuclear. But I do believe it will be something like that.”
Robertson said God told him about the impending tragedy during a recent prayer retreat.
God also said, he claims, that major cities and possibly millions of people will be affected by the attack, which should take place sometime after September.
Now you might be tempted to blow off Robertson as just another fruitcake who would be pushing around a rusted shopping cart festooned with cardboard signs proclaiming the end times in orange magic marker, if he weren’t so good at stealing money the from the elderly and the poor. You’d be making a huge mistake. Did you know he can lift 2000 lbs with his legs? No, shit. 2000 Lbs! Have a look at this:
Did you know that Pat Robertson, through rigorous training, leg-pressed 2,000 pounds! How did he do it?
Where does Pat find the time and energy to host a daily, national
TV show, head a world-wide ministry, develop visionary scholars,
while traveling the globe as a statesman?One of Pat’s secrets to keeping his energy high and
his vitality soaring is his age-defying protein shake.
Pat developed a delicious, refreshing shake, filled with energy-producing
nutrients.Discover what kinds of natural ingredients
make up Pat’s protein shake by registering for your FREE
booklet today!
Do you still dare doubt global statesman Pat Robertson? Yeah, that’s what I thought. Better order your age-defying protein shakes before September.
Pat Robertson predicts ‘mass killing’
In what has become an annual tradition of prognostications, religious broadcaster Pat Robertson said
The only way Pat will be right on this one is if:
a) his good pal, Shrubbie, lets another terrorist attack get through
b) his good pals in McVeigh’s circle decide to pull off another attack to show the nation how unhappy they are that their cronies in Washington aren’t as powerful as they once were
c) his comrade-in-arms, Sunyung Moon, sets it up with his bestest-bud EVAR, Kim Jong Il.
With those three possibilities on the table, I think it’s time to send Pat to gitmo and find out what he knows and what he’s planning. He’s a danger to America.
I just wish, as Christian who actually has read the bible, wish he would just shut up and go away.
Once again through Rev Loopie, God has delivered a clear message to those 700 club faithful who follow along at home.
Which is this: with all that death and mayhem coming along in the next few months you’d be better off all holding on to your money instead of shipping it off to someone like Robertson who won’t need it nearly as much as you will if you’re one of those “millions” who will be affected.
So God spends all that time and effort to create a magnificent, fantastic universe, then spends his break time talking to a schmuck like Robertson?
OK, so I clicked through and saw the video of Robertson leg-pressing not 2000, but 1000 lbs. I can only assume they’re using fake weights, because it makes no sense.
This so reminds me of Chairman Mao swimming in the river.