When you ask people to destroy their own souls, you should have a better reason:

He and other soldiers discussed the Geneva Conventions during military training at Fort Gordon, Georgia, in 2003, before being deployed to Iraq. But it became clear they were not always expected to abide by them, he says. Some of the soldiers and officers had been influenced by Mark Bowden’s October 2003 Atlantic Monthly article, “The Dark Art of Interrogation,” which describes techniques that, in the author’s words, are “excruciating for the victim” yet “leave no permanent marks and do no lasting physical harm.”

“It seems to me Bowden was advocating what he calls ‘torture lite,’” Lagouranis tells me. “That made an impression on a lot of people. The feeling was that what we had been taught about the Geneva Conventions was not going to be followed anymore. We would be following a new set of rules — and that was what Bowden was talking about.”

Things seemed different in Iraq. “I started realizing that most of the prisoners were innocent,” Lagouranis says. “We were torturing people for no reason. I started getting really angry and really remorseful and by the time I got back I completely broke down.”

Maybe that was a normal reaction, I tell him.

“That’s what my shrink told me,” he says. “I can just say that people don’t fully realize that for a person to do that to another human being — it definitely takes a toll.”

Back during the NYU event, Lagouranis had sat behind a long table on a stage with his sleeves rolled up and his arms folded across his chest. Toward the end of the discussion, he leaned forward and told the audience that, ultimately, the abuse of prisoners could not be blamed on shows like 24. “I’m from New York City. I’m college-educated,” he said. “But you put me in Iraq and told me to torture, and I did it and I regretted it later.”

It is clear that he and others like him will be dealing with the fallout from the war, especially those aspects that have been hidden from public view, for a long time. “I didn’t know I would discover and indulge in my own evil,” he writes in his forthcoming book. “And now that it has surfaced, I fear that it will be my constant companion for the rest of my life.”

There’s a kind of Stockholm syndrome you sometimes see in reporters, usually those who cover politics or the police beat. They start to relate so strongly to those they cover, they lose all moral context and construct elaborate rationalizations for abuses. Bowden’s been covering the military a long, long time. Maybe that’s what happened here.