Insert your joke here:
STOCKHOLM, Sweden - A Swedish bomb squad called out to disarm a suspicious package on Wednesday did not find a ticking bomb. But they did find a vibrating sex toy.
A janitor alerted police after he found the package in a garage of an apartment building in Goteborg, the country’s second-largest city, police spokesman Jan Strannegard said.
The package was humming and vibrating suspiciously, so police took no chances and sent out a team of explosives experts. After having cordoned off the area, they opened the package with bomb disposal equipment, only to find the battery-operated device inside.
“The package was vibrating when the janitor found it, but I think it had sort of died out by the time it was disarmed,” Strannegard said.
I’d like to know what a “suspicious” hum and vibrate looks and sounds like? And I hope he meant “died out” in a good sense.
Cigarette, anyone?
I guess it didn’t have Energizer batteries.
Well, I guess we can all look to the Alabama State Government and their innovative legislation against vibrato-terrorists. Although, really, one has to credit quite a few southern states (Georgia? Texas?) for getting out in front of this growing threat.
The US south: home of REAL dicks.
As a resident of the southeastern US and owner of a modest collection of battery-operated sex toys (and an assortment of fake dicks; we have both kinds here), I can only say: take the batteries out before you mail them. Or before you stash them in a drawer in the living room when guests are coming over.
That is all.
“We have both kinds here.” I laughed so hard, it brought tears to my eyes.