Lambert Feels My Pain
Mar 27th, 2008 at 12:33 am by Chris
Yeah, Mark Penn downloads my orders directly from Clinton World Headquarters to my cranial chip.
Apparently, it never occurs to the Marshella that Clinton supporters—and voters—might, er, genuinely support her? That they might be able to make up their own minds based on evidence and reasoning?
First of all, please take the time to read the byline on this post. This will make any comments you might choose to leave on the post, not only better informed, but also more edifying and educational to the potential readers of your comments than the comments of people who decline my gracious invitation to read the byline. I can tell a lie, but I promise this is true.
My name is Chris and I’m an Obama supporter. I’ve been sober an Obama supporter for six months. (At this point, if you’d like to offer a cheerful “Hi Chris!” that wouldn’t be inappropriate.) While I differ in some technical ways from Lambert, in that I receive my instructions from the O-Borg via a direct connection to a bioport which is installed on my spine just above my shoulder blades, I still feel as though we have something of a shared experience. People are free to blather on about free will, evidence and reasoning all they like, but in this room, we’re all aware that everybody is just a mindless automatron carrying out the actions prescribed to them by whichever political campaign was able to install its hardware and software suite into our thoughtless brains and lifeless bodies first. I have to say, I’m really feeling a lot of unity in this room. Maybe we can get together and hug later.
Thanks for letting me….oh, fuck it. I’m sick of this stupid joke.
I would have left something akin to this in Lambert’s comment, though better written and actually funny, if the Mighty Corrente building would ever have seen fit to approve my account and let me leave comments on their site. Alas, I must make do with babbling like a loon from the sidelines. Such is life.
Thanks for the link.
Because the salary structure at The Mighty Corrente Building doesn’t run to, like, actual money, administrative chores aren’t handled with the same brutal efficiency with which we try to handle trolls. However, I had thought I was fully caught up on the many new accounts we are getting. That said, we also get bots, and so there have been a few cases where, when I couldn’t verify anything about the account, I just didn’t approve it, figuing they’d mail me if they were human. So, if you will mail me using the contact form — or if you are able to induce your controller to send the proper signals through your chip — I will approve your account.
Do you have a Fair, Unbiased Clintonista Kicking You Over Unity?
Make an anagram for Lambert.
Lambert, thanks, but I prefer complaining about a powerful coalition of forces conspiring to keep me and my millionaire candidate down over any sort of constructive action.