Purity balls are just disgusting. Where to begin? You start telling little girls their only real value is in their “purity,” and not their character. That Daddy always knows best, and let’s not soil our souls with any of that autonomy nonsense. That hymens are the most (the only) valuable thing girls have to offer. And you wrap it all up in some fundamentalist nonsense about your dad being the “High Priest.” Oh, and you tell girls sex is disgusting and tainted, so you should save it for the man you marry. ETF?

Creepily enough, now the idea is creeping into secular society, where dads present crown-shaped “princess rings” to their daughters on their 16th birthdays — to remind them to only to chose males who treat her like Dad and Jesus do. (Dad may be running around on Mom, but he buys his daughter a princess ring, and that’s all that counts. Well, actually, Mom bought it and ordered him to give it to his princess, but hey, his kid will never know.) The madonna-whore complex lives!

Here’s a thought: How about just raising girls to be smart, thoughtful and discerning? How about presenting a real-life role model of a loving, caring, respectful and mutual adult relationship so she knows what it looks like? How about educating her, preparing her to make her own way in the world, and trusting her to ask for help if she needs it?

Oh, and by the way, Purity dads: You should at least know your daughters are statistically more likely to use condoms and birth control — probably so you won’t find out.