3 thoughts on “Just when you thought it was safe”

  1. Isn’t this along the same lines as “dog bites man” or “congressman interested in sex???”

  2. Candygram

    [Scene: A New York apartment. Someone knocks on the door.]
    Woman: [not opening the door] Yes?
    Voice: (mumbling) Mrs. Arlsburgerhhh?
    Woman: Who?
    Voice: (mumbling) Mrs. Johannesburrrr?
    Woman: Who is it?
    Voice: [pause] Flowers.
    Woman: Flowers for whom?
    Voice: [long pause] Plumber, ma’am.
    Woman: I don’t need a plumber. You’re that clever shark, aren’t you?
    Voice: [pause] Candygram.
    Woman: Candygram, my foot. You get out of here before I call the police. You’re the shark, and you know it.
    Voice: Wait. I-I’m only a dolphin, ma’am.
    Woman: A dolphin? Well…okay. [opens door]
    [Huge latex and foam-rubber shark head lunges through open door, chomps down on woman’s head, and drags her out of the apartment, all while the Jaws attack music is playing.]

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