I gotta tell you, I know what Trump’s going through: an existential sense of dread. Because when you have covid (even the “mild” version), you know things can change at any moment – the symptoms shift constantly. I’ve described it to people as the virus knocking on the door of every single organ and system, looking for a way in. I only had two brief episodes of that “train sitting on my chest” feeling, but a half hour was enough to scare the living shit out of me.

Which is why I tell people to be careful. Which is why I’m still careful.

Because I keep hearing these stories about people who wore masks faithfully, and still got it. I know when I was in the hospital (which is where I assume I caught it), I wore a mask the entire time (except when I was on a C-Pap machine). Maybe it wasn’t sanitized enough; I don’t know.

And as I’ve said, I have recurring symptoms. I feel a lot better in between relapses than I did, but the relapses are scary. (Two weeks ago, my sinuses swelled up and my face hurt really bad.) I still can’t taste anything the way it used to be. Everything tastes metalllic, or bitter. You’d think that would result in massive weight loss, but instead I find myself eating even more, compulsively seeking something that has some kind of enjoyable taste. Oh well.

My throat is still shot, it’s very difficult to sing. It’s also difficult to take a deep enough breath to sustain a note. My tongue is swollen; it feels like it’s splitting open sometimes.

I still remember the beginning, the bone-deep chills that lasted for days. No fever, which is why my doctor didn’t take me seriously. (Thank God for nurse practitioners.) We know know about a third of covid patients don’t get fevers. We also know the tests are unreliable.

Mike and Karen Pence tested negative, but here’s something to keep in mind: The White House relies on the rapid Abbott ID NOW test, which has a false negative rate of *51 percent.* It is basically as accurate as a coin toss. https://t.co/KHLEH5NS15

— Julia Ioffe (@juliaioffe) October 2, 2020

So here’s the thing. All these Republican politicians, claiming they tested negative? Doesn’t mean a thing. Yet they’re still going out and about, still not wearing masks.

A photograph that shows a Republican senator wearing a mask incorrectly on a plane has gone viral on Twitter.

Captured by Twitter user Matt Harringer, the picture shows Sen. Roger Wicker (R-Miss.) aboard a Delta Air Lines https://t.co/JmuJQKqSr9

— Watch TV Abroad (@WatchTVAnywhere) October 4, 2020

In conclusion, I don’t care if Trump dies. I’d rather he’d live, so we can kick his ass and then send him to prison, and drive his entire toxic party with him.